Ok, so I've actually been focusing on school for once and haven't used this at all. I just re-read some entries and I'm really glad I wrote all this as I was living the journey. There are so many things I feel like, I'm forgetting or scared of forgetting.

Studying just makes me reminise like CRAZY. Except, I was remembering all the bad experiences the other day. Especially the horrible time I had at the airports. Man, I never hated airports as much as the ones in Brazil. The staff were not friendly and I felt like they just hired anyone. I'm pretty sure we have a lot higher standards for anyone who works at our airports. I had totally forgotten about this memory about how, I was late for my flight and got yelled at 3 times by the airport people and I don't even know for what. I never wanted to shoot someone the finger and scream out loud so badly. But I kept my poise and dignity and just sucked it in. I remember having a conversation with the 2 guys in line with me. Both not speaking one word of English but we understood each other. I think that was the best, when I found people who were willing to talk to me, despite a bit of a language barrier and I was not afraid to practise the language. I'm slowing losing the language and it frustrates me. Why don't we offer Portuguese at the U? Grrr...I'll have to take it later.

It's been 6 months and I still think about it everyday. Is this normal? Que saudades!!!

I made this background for my laptop to remember the good times:

Time flies

I'm losing count of how many days and weeks its been since I've left but I almost feel like I never left home. I feel like I've been here forever and Brazil was a long time ago. It's sad because already I haven't talked to a lot of my AIESEC friends over there. Only a handful of them still message me now and then. But I was warned that Brazilians don't really like to keep in touch. I even had a full out conversation about it with one of them hehe. I think he mentioned that he didn't want to force a friendship on the other person because he wasn't sure if they wanted to still be friends with him. I was just like "wtheck?!" Just try contacting them and find out. Don't just want for the other person to message you. The problem is I'm always the one messaging them so I think I understand what he means. Friendship should be a two way street. Sometimes they should be the one initiating the contact.

Anyways, enough of that. On the weekend we all went out and they actually played some latino music and I was so happy! Except that I had no one to dance with. I'm so used to having a really good partner dancing with me and having so much fun. It kinda sucked. It made me really miss the samba-ing and salsa dancing. So many little things can just trigger a memory or emotion. Like randomly while sitting at the computer I think of the annoying morning calls we got at the conference and was actually missing it. Everytime I think of something similar to Brazil, I just want to talk about it, but then I feel like I'm getting annoying talking about it all the time. I just can't help it though. I need to let it out and explain because my friends weren't there with me to experience it, to know how I felt. I'm glad everyone's been pretty good about it and are willing to listen to the million stories I have. I guess I'm usually like this but not specifically about Brazil so they have gotten used to me. (I hope.)

I'm just happy that my favorite gringos are all back in americano de norte now. But now its actually harder to get together and keep in touch because of our everyday busy lives. I really miss Funk Brasilieros too!!

Like Prison

You must be wondering what is this entry about...well basically that fact that my city is so hot and humid that I can't stand to be outside. I feel SOO trapped. I'm so used to be being able to go outside and run in the morning or just take a walk. I can't do that here without the possibility of getting heat stroke. It's just a little frustrating. People have also commented that I'm not really dark coming back, well, whatever tan I did have coming back has surely faded with the lack of sun exposure. I miss being outside! I know I can just suck it up and go outside but I guess its more then just being outside, its the fresh air, the populated parks full of trees and trails. I think I'm just still missing Brasil a lot. I hate to be annoying but I can't help but compare everything to what I once knew. Surprisingly, even food tastes differently here. I mean, you would think after eatting this stuff for 20 or so years that 2.5 months of being away, I would be used to it again. Sweets are TOO sweet for me and I'm just still not used to the food here. Miss it so much. I need to focus more and get busy and not think about all the things I miss so much or else I won't get anything done here.

1 week since Brasil...

AIESEC Brasilia after my last dinner with them!

Today last week was my last day in Brasil. Its been a week back home and OMGOSH, has it been a long week. I remember on Monday just feeling lifeless and bored. I hate being bored and usually rare get bored. It was nice, on Sunday the first full dayback, my friends got a birthday cake for all my friends who weren't here in the summer to celebrate together. I was included since I was in Toronto when it was my birthday. It was so nice, just the feeling of warmth I miss about my Brasilian friends.

I guess I've been doing something everyday since I've been back so that hasn't changed from my normal schedule in Brasil. I saw Ratatouille on Tuesday, which was cute because I saw the commercials for it in the theatres in Brasil and its almost like closure to be able to get to finally see the movie after so much anticipation.

I have a TON of work to do because I got selected to be Organizing Committee President of a Regional Conference (OCP) so I'm kinda freaking out because this conference usually gets a year to plan and I have about 1.5 months. I just have to DO it and not let my fear take over. I think it'll be a good learning experience, especially learning to trust the team you work with that they will get things done like expected. I don't even know what will be happening for sure in Sept. Of course the easiest thing would be to be admitted into nursing right away and I won't feel like I'm wasting a year. I'm starting to see beyond the bad of staying home for another year, but that's just because I'm trying to be optimisitc. I hope this weekends fun, I miss having friends just call me up everydaywith plans. I still don't know what I'm doing this weekend. It sucks! I hate wasting weekends. I really wanna go to the beach since I miss it so much. I'll have to call some people up.

Worst 30 hours of travelling!

(Written at the airport when it happened July 27th 11:30pm)

The WORST 16 hours of my life!

Surprisingly, leaving Brasil was really smooth. Everything was on time and Jonas was super nice and drove me to the airport at 3:30am. We met an old AIESEC member who actually finished her internship in March on my flight. So the flight from Brasilia to Sao Paulo was fine even though it was TAM and it was Sao Paulo. Then from Sao Paulo to Atlanta, Georgia was really smooth. When I arrived in Atlanta airport, I knew something bad was going to happen. The place was craziness, just people running around everywhere, lines for the passport check-out that didn’t even go anywhere. I wore my Brasil shirt proudly and a Brasilian thought I was Brasilian and started asking me for help. Yay, another chance to speak Portuguese! So after that I went through security which took forever because there were so many people. I know there was one Brasilian guy I definitely should have followed and I would have gotten to Toronto on time. But no, I got confused because my luggage was being shipped by Delta and my flight was with “United” but apparently it was Air Canada. (Stupid itinerary!!! All the wrong info.) I also realized I still didn’t have a boarding pass to go to Toronto!? WTHeck? How did this happen? So I went back to where I started and waited 30 mins for the Delta people just to tell me that I was in the wrong place and that my luggage was being sent off without a destination tag!! I had to wait and go through security AGAIN!!! My flight was for 8:05pm and now it was 8:15 pm!!! Omgosh, I was stressed. I took the tram to Concourse T where they told me I should go and walked through all 20 something gates and I still didn’t see AIR Canada. “Air Canada” is in Concourse D. By the way, your flight already left!! The next flight is at 6:25am the next day!” Nossa (omgosh), as if I hadn’t already done enough walking in this stupid airport and now I had to wait another 9 hours to go to Toronto!!!! I just want to go home! (I guess I got what I wished for when I kept thinking how much I didn’t want to go home.)

At this point a good idea was probably to go and call my parents. BUT… PROBLEM: my cell phone wouldn’t turn on and I couldn’t remember anyone’s phone number after not calling anyone in almost 3 months!!! OMGOSH, everything was a dead end. I searched through my purse, maybe I wrote some numbers somewhere? I couldn’t even remember my grandparent’s number and ended up calling another Chinese person in Windsor (lol). Oh man, life sucks right now. So I find a place to plug in my laptop and maybe somewhere in there, I will find a number. I have no internet connection so I couldn’t search online. Maybe on Skype I’ll find it, but couldn’t log on without internet. L So now what? Somehow I found an old letter I wrote for my dad that I saved and I found his cell phone number in it!! Thank God!!! So called that and no one picked up! So hopefully that was his number I called because the letter was back in November of 2006.

Ok, now onto trying to figure out how to get a boarding pass with AIR CANADA for the next morning. More walking around the airport with useless airport workers directing me all over the airport. I finally found it and OF COURSE there’s not one there anymore because its CLOSED!!! I should have known. Now what to do?! I called AIR Canada and they said all I could do was wait till tomorrow morning. Boy, do I hate airports right now. So I’m sitting at a restaurant right now waiting for the next day to come. I’m super worried about the family because now they have to either find a place to stay or sleep in the airport all night. I hate burdening other people. They already had to take time out of work to get me and now this. I’m so frustrated with the whole day. How is it that nothing like this happened in Brasil but in the US, I go through all this crap!?

(Written July 28, 2007 at 11pm)

So I barely slept all night in the freezing cold airport on the worst bench ever made. I got up at 4:30am to get checked-in. That went smoothly and I got my ticket. I still had no idea what happened with my luggage but the attendant told me to ask the person at the gate and they would be able to help me. Luckily, as I was boarding the plane, the attendant informs me they found my bag!! Yay, so now just to get to Toronto! I get to Toronto and didn’t see my family, tried calling again by using my credit card to pay and again it wouldn’t work. Went to go buy a phone card and when I turned around, I saw my family wandering around looking for meJ Then we drove off and I had my first real Chinese meal in 2.5 months!:) Dim sum!! (Please google if you’re not sure what Dim sum is.) How I missed those egg tarts! Then some shopping at Pacific Mall and a 3.5 hour drive to my city (Windsor).

What I will miss about Brasil

Two days left till I leave for Canada. I can't believe how fast time has gone by. I totally can see myself living here again in the future. Next time with better Portuguese and more money in my pockets hehe. I am going to miss it here SOO SOOO MUCH. I can't even pinpoint what, but here are a list of somethings I will miss. I think I'll be continually updating this as time goes along because there are going to be so many things from big to little that I will miss.

-Having a maid
-Trying to speak Portuguese
-Churrasco and any street food that's super good and CHEAP. IE. Tapica!!!
-Fairs with lots of nice handcrafts for reasonable prices
-Dancing parties on the bridge at the wee hours of the morning
-Laughing at Beeps and Patricia's randomness
-Singing in the car with Beeps, Patty, and Dan
-Skating at the mall in the worst skates ever but with great company
-Travelling with and meeting all the interns in different parts of Brazil
-Travelling
-Tasting new and different things
-Caprivokcsas com morangos
-Agua de coco (fresh coco water)


-The beautiful sunsets
-BEACHES, BEACHES, AND BEACHES!!


-Rio!!
-Acai


-Cheap salgados (pastels, coxinhos..)
-Inexpensive manicures and pedicures
-AIESECers in Brasil
-Old European inspired buildings
-Modern Oscar Niemeyer buildings (Esplanada)
-Running in the parks (Parque do Cidade e Parque Olhos D'Aguas)
-Festa Juninas
-Capoeira
-Dancing Samba, Forro, Salsa

What I miss about Canada

I think this will be 2 parts, one about Canada and one about Brazil.

-My parent's cooking and basically CHINESE FOOD!!!
-Pooky (my car), not just the object but the freedom of being about to drive around everywhere and go when I want
-My bed, I think my back actually touches the frame:(
-My family
-My friends- meeting up to go to Starbucks, going out to eat together, movie nights, talks on the phone
-Good shopping!!! I did go to some good fairs here and found some awesome stuff but everything is way too expensive in my city and it was sad not being able to afford a single thing.
-Grey's Anatomy, American's Next top Model and whatever reality crap that's out there, that I just can't get enough of.
-Making cookies (I definitely wouldn't have spent R$20 on ingredients when I could have bought them for R$2.)
-People being somewhat on time. (Brazilian time is WORSE then Chinese time).
-Grocery shopping and finding everything I need.
-Being able to use the pay phone just with a quarter, instead of having to buy a phone card.

Surprisingly, I can't think of more things I miss about Canada. I really do love it here and I think it will be apparent when I write the things I will miss about Brasil, which will most likely be longer.